{ lions say {RAWR} ]

Mon, 04 Jun 2007 16:34:21 GMT

This journal is being disowned. It will be deleted in about 36hours. My new one is gottaketchamall

Sun, 03 Jun 2007 12:50:40 GMT

So I'm deleting this journal. Let's start with that.

I reread it last night, while I was thinking. It's got everything from about the time Gabe and I started dating in it, so it stretches back quite a ways.

It's nice to know I continue to repeat the same mistakes.

So I'm deleting it, and hopefully letting it all go. Fresh air would be nice.

My other journal is staying though, so Katherine, you'll still have to deal with my emo poetry from time to time.

Umm.

Thanks.

Angry rant about sensitivity.....and then a real entry.

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 22:46:11 GMT

Ok, look. When it comes to my body, I'm not particularly sensitive, but there is one subject that you can reduce me to tears pretty quickly if you bring up. You can go ahead and laugh, and tell me my hair's too frizzy, my butt's too big, my left eye's a bit lazy, my ear's stick out, my nail's are short, and my chest's too small. But if you bring up the fact that my skin is just down right awful, I snap.

My dad, who has all the tact of a Reese's monkey, proclaimed very loudly today that my skin is bad and that I could be a really pretty girl if I took care of it, but right now I'm just well...

So I snapped back, and now they're angry with me. And I now have to go see a doctor about it??? Fuck no. It'll go away on its own damn time. Just leave me be!!!!

</end rant>

Umm... other than that, life is uneventful. I'm babysitting on Thursdays and have my work cut out for me this summer, both at work and at karate (apparently I'm testing at the beginning of next month. Not quite sure why, but he told me I would today. Hmm.)

Plans for this month include Sturbridge with Mrs. Sylvester and her boys (Aiden, who's 10, Patrick, who's 7, and Liam, who's 4), babysitting Damien, working at BEC, a trip to Long Island (NEXT WEEKEND!!!!), a dentist appointment, and possibly driving to the ocean. And maybe a new car. I don't know.

Umm...That's it. There's other stuff, but I really don't want to talk about it, so I won't. So....END.

Fri, 25 May 2007 23:54:18 GMT

The Everything Test

There are many different types of tests on the internet today. Personality tests, purity tests, stereotype tests, political tests. But now, there is one test to rule them all.

Traditionally, online tests would ask certain questions about your musical tastes or clothing for a stereotype, your experiences for a purity test, or deep questions for a personality test.We're turning that upside down - all the questions affect all the results, and we've got some innovative results too! Enjoy :-)

Personality

You are more emotional than logical, more concerned about others than concerned about self, more atheist than religious, more loner than dependent, more lazy than workaholic, more traditional than rebel, more engineering mind than artistic mind, more cynical than idealist, more leader than follower, and more extroverted than introverted.

As for specific personality traits, you are outgoing (100%), romantic (71%), musical (68%).

Stereotypes
Punk Rock	93%
Emo Kid	89%
College Student	73%

Life Experience
Sex	38%
Substances	32%
Travel	24%

Politics
Your political views would best be described as Liberal, whom you agree with around 54% of the time.

Socioeconomic
Your attitude toward life best associates you with Working Class. You make more than 30% of those who have taken this test, and 93% less than the U.S. average.

If your life was a movie, it would be rated PG-13.
By the way, your hottness rank is 60%, hotter than 47% of other test takers.

TAKE THE TEST
brought to you by thatsurveysite

Fri, 18 May 2007 15:17:43 GMT

I'm done with exams! This makes me happy.

Everyone's leaving. This makes me sad.

Dream

Tue, 15 May 2007 21:54:24 GMT

For some reason, I had tickets to go see the circus. The circus was in Ronkonkoma, and in order to get there, I had to take a train. Matty and Justine decided not to go, so I walked down the Hempstead Turnpike, and took a left onto a street that looked suspiciously like Route 44 in Greenville to get to the train station, which looked like Grand Central, and then was suddenly on the train. I was carrying my big blue pep band duffel bag (I kept hitting people with it) and I didn't have a ticket, so I had to keep dodging the conductors by moving up cars. The train itself was red and old fasioned, with a black interior and seats like the ghetto trains here have. There were also these balcony seats outside the windows.

At the rear of the train, I ran into a man who looked like my dad and his young son whose name was Daniel. The kid was about three or four years old and had the same silly mushroom cut my brother had when he was little. He kept running away from his dad, who kept yelling at him. I talked to the man about my brother and then counted the stops to Ronkonkoma, because the speaker system was fuzzy. The train was making stops, but no one seemed to be getting off, and then it suddenly stopped and EVERYONE was in front of the door and I managed to sneak outside without the conductors ticketing me.

Then I was outside of the circus, which was in this big silver building with no doors and a low cut hedge maze (but for some reason you couldn't step on the hedges. Don't remember why- but it was low cut enough you could see through it.) A man with a swipe card appeared inside the maze and the father-figure (minus the kid) and I were about half way through it when Matty called and scared me into reality.

Fri, 11 May 2007 20:52:38 GMT

Subbing again. I've doing that alot lately- I picked up a five hour shift last night, and then two hours today (Jetsfan was willing to promise his first born if I took this shift for him. I told him to keep the kid, but he owes me dinner.) I'm picking up Cam's shift next Friday night....sooooo craziness. I'll be rich. :D

Started packing today. The majority of my desk is in boxes, along with all of my dresses and coats from my closet and everything on my walls. Hannah was shocked when she got back and saw I took down all the posters and pictures. The walls look entirely too bare. When I get off my shift, I'm going to tackle the stuff on the wall by my desk and maybe some of my clothes if I'm feeling ambitious. I don't go home until a week from tomorrow, but I want to be able to devote all of next week to school and hanging out with friends. I really don't want to worry about packing then.

I have to do laundry today, but that should be the last time I do it before I go home. I had to pick up detergent which sucked, because I'm going to go home with an almost full bottle of All. No dryer sheets at Dutch though... oh well.

Played Manhunt last night! Got dragged around Calkins Quad at 2am kicking and screaming towards the jail. All in all, a good time.

That's it, really.

Mon, 30 Apr 2007 08:28:24 GMT

My weekend's been so bad it's made me consider transferring to URI. I don't know. It was brought up as a possibility because of the whole "we have to re-wire the whole house" deally, but this has actually made me stop and think about it as a viable option. There are other reasons too, but I always had something keeping me here. Don't get me wrong, I hate URI. I hate the campus, the location, the whole bit, but at least there I know what to expect. I don't know. This whole situation has just thrown me for a loop.

I'm not used to relying on someone as heavily as I rely on her. And I fucked up. I fucked up. And now, she won't even speak to me long enough to allow me to apologize. The worst part is, where she goes, Matty follows, which leaves me with.......Cam. And I feel bad on that one. Today, he was nice enough to put up with me for literally the whole day: I drifted outside sometime during his RSR shift in Republic this morning, stayed until he went to his room, followed, and stayed with him until three. Then at 10:30 he came downstairs and watched a movie. It's not fair to him though- he's not exactly the social type, and I feel ridiculous imposing on him all the fucking time. But he's it. That's it.

Fuck, I'm as alone as when I started.

Ryan didn't help matters either, but we discussed it. Needless to say, I was alone. All day.

.....Lea and I could get that apartment we always thought about.......

......Gabe would still be there, in a more literal sense.......

.......that long distance relationship wouldn't be quite so long distant......

I want to scream and hit something. I feel like I'm being torn in half.

Thu, 26 Apr 2007 13:30:57 GMT

We're supposed to get thunderstorms tomorrow. I hope we do- really angry ones with lots of lightning. I need a good thunderstorm.

The end of the year laziness is hitting me hard. I skipped my last two Japanese classes.... cause I'm awful like that. When I get out of work, I'm gonna go for a walk. Campus has all of a sudden become pretty.

Umm... I did something stupid last night, but, in a way, it worked out, so its ok.

I want to watch a sappy movie like whoa. And someone to cuddle with. I, unfortunately, have the former, but not the latter.

: /

Tue, 24 Apr 2007 13:56:13 GMT

Working working working.....

I have a half an hour left.

I had a blast last night. They held a drag show in the student center, and it= amazing. Justine and I were both collections of boys clothes from upstairs. I wore Rafal's tux pants and jacket and Steve's shoes, socks, shirt, vest, bow tie, and cuff links. It took a couple of tries to get it all right- Steve's pants didn't fit me and I ended up having to ask around for another pair of pants. I also had to bind my chest which meant I couldn't breathe and Matt ripped on me from going from a C to nothing.

Justine looked like a trucker. She also did a random collection from the boys upstairs and ended up wearing Nick's pants and hat, Mike's wife-beater, Adam's belt, Kevin's boxers, Steve's shoes, and Cam's Ninja turtle's hoodie. She, all in all, looked hilarious. We rolled up a paper joint for her and then had to teach her how to properly hold a cigarette. Matt kissed her on the cheek and left a huge lip print, and that was pretty sweet too.

And Matt! Matt wore my green skirt and white halter top and Justine's wedge heels. He also wore a flower in his hair and shit loads of make up. He ended up looking like a pregnant hula dancer with really short hair. It was great. :D

Cam came upstairs to see us off and nearly dropped his sax when Matty opened the door. Oh dear....

The show itself was amazing. The MC's were hilarious and there were a few really funny acts including renditions of "Holla back girl," "Dick in a box," and "I need a hero," as well as a funny dancing cop. The people on stage definitly had fun with it and it meant the audience did too.

Umm... in other news, I've been following baseball. Err... it has a lot to do with hanging out with Cam because he's really into it, so I've been learning. He was disappointed the Yanks lost not once, not twice, but three times to the Sox last week. :D

I've got a project due in psycholinguistics on Thursday, and ~~I'm debating skipping Japanese today~~ I am skipping Japanese today. I end up sleeping through it, and I'm not feeling all that well anyway. I've only missed it twice, and I'm really far ahead anyway (most of my class hasn't opened the text book yet....) I'll just pick up the assignments from Lara.

Tue, 24 Apr 2007 03:34:42 GMT

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Fri, 20 Apr 2007 12:11:49 GMT

I've got fifteen minutes before I leave for class, so I figured I'd update.

Ummm..... yesterday was weird. I was completely apathetic to everything, and didn't go to not one but two of my classes. I worked from about 8 to 10:45 (my replacement was that late) and decided to skip my 11:10-12:35. I went back to the dorm and ate lunch with Dan and watched Cops or something of that nature. Went to phonetics and then decided to skip psycholinguistics.

I ended up going for a walk and wandering off to this little field that I didn't know existed. It was a really pretty day, so I took off my shoes and jacket and spun in circles till I fell over. Then I watched the clouds and thought about stuff until I fell asleep.

I woke up because it was cold. And the sun was setting. So I walked back and took a shower. Justine showed up and we watched Blazing Saddles with Cameron.

I realized something. I wish I could take pictures of moments and not just the people in them.

That would be amazing.

Thu, 12 Apr 2007 14:26:32 GMT

It's so cold today. It's raining very hard and the wind is blowing and I don't have a raincoat. The walk to Netherlands and then to the student center after work means that I am thoroughly drenched. At least two of my three classes today are in the same building.

Justine and I are thinking about getting a house our junior year! She's living in Twin Oaks next year (there's a pretty good chance I will be too, actually) and then... well, we'll figure it out. I personally like the idea, cause it would mean not having to go back to RI over the summer. So even if the house idea falls through, I'll prolly get an apartment. :D

Umm... it's cold, but I've said that already. People have the door in the Student Center propped open, and the wind is blowing in. I wish they'd close it.

I got a job RSRing yesterday, and I've just come off my second shift. It wasn't that bad- Netherlands tends to double RSR, so there was this Turkish grad student sitting with me. He was pretty cool. :)

Yesterday I covered for Jets fan. I was a bit annoyed about it- I was under the impression that he was going to sleep or something because he was up almost as late as I was the other night, but he went to the beach instead. -_-; I don't know. Whatever. This was one of the reasons I wanted to leave BEC. I never actually had any of my own time off- I always ended up covering peoples shifts for the dumbest reasons.

Oh well. I told him he owes me. He'll never end up covering any of my shifts. I've got a 4-8am one, two 8-10am, and a 12-4pm on Saturday.

On the bright side, Dynamic pride was last night! It was amazing! Sang "Can you feel the love tonight?"! Jill and I sang alto! The third alto had no idea what she was doing! Hahaha

I can't wait for next Wednesday!

April Fools.

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 03:48:35 GMT

I had completely forgotten about this inane and foolish holiday so when I hopped on facebook and was greeted with the following message....

I was very confused. Ok, well no shit Sherlock. But further down I was given another clue....

Really?? Justine would love that! But she's in England.... As I pondered the mechanics of the whole operation, I continued to read....

Oh goodness, I can just hear the uproar that will cause at school.

I miss way too much when I'm busy on Thursday nights.

The oxen always drown. I hate crossing rivers in Oregon Trail.

But the real kicker?

......

::bursts out laughing::

-----------------------------------------

And now for something completely different.

Yesterday I hung out with Beth Hallum. We were both bored, so I went to her house, picked her up and we went and played frisbee golf (So much fun. I'm sooooooo bad at it.) We talked about stuff, from boys to how much Rhode Island sucks to Judy Lopez. It was fun!

Gabe called and asked about seeing a movie and I told him I'd get back to him on that.

We harassed Lea and Sara at work and I was jumped by a crazy old lady whose granddaughter goes to Hofstra in the parking lot of Wright's. We were given free food and sent on our merry way.

Pick up Gabe (and his friend, Mike) in Woonsocket and went to the movies, where we met up with Lea. The boys all bitched because we wanted to see Blades of Glory, but enjoyed it in the end. Beth went home with Lea, I dropped off Mike and then talked with Gabe.

It was....enlightening. And needed- for both of us. He spent half the ride holding onto my sweatshirt like I was going to vanish into thin air again. We talked about a lot of things and worked out a few of our issues. And well,

It looks like I have a friend in him again.

And that's nice. I really would hate to lose that.

Now, if I could just work out a few of my OWN issues, I'd have a boyfriend again.

Mon, 26 Mar 2007 06:53:19 GMT

I'm reasonably sure at this point I'm psychotic. I could go with the "I hate my life statement" but that strikes me as a tad too emo.

This what you get.

Sorry.

Mon, 26 Mar 2007 02:27:14 GMT

So last night could have sucked. Justine and Matt went to a party (and left me behind, as has been the trend the past couple weekends) and so I had nothing to do. But when the people in the lounge started talking about going bowling, I asked if I could tag along. I was surprised when they said yes, and I'm incredibly glad I went. There were eleven of us: Me, T. Tran, JetsFan, 3/4 of the News Team (Naomi, Jill, and Steph), Joe, Briana, Christine, Justin, and Steve. I had a blast.

Came back and watched Narnia in Cam's room with him and Theresa until 4am, and got harassed by drunk people as I left.

Then this morning I had a pep band gig at 8am (with I was late for, go figure.) Came back and slept until 1pm, when Hannah and her boyfriend came in. Then I went to Target with Justine, watched the Blazers and then the UNC v Geogetown game (Blazers lost by one, GT won by twelve in overtime) and am now taking a break from homework.

Random plans too! Possibly England this summer?? WHAT??? :D

All in all, best weekend in awhile. I was social! It was amazing!

Ahh well, now onto Fredrick Douglass!

Thu, 22 Mar 2007 21:50:51 GMT

Its a beautiful day outside. :D

I had class forever today and spent most of it staring out the window. And I got back and was happy because my day was over. Went to Eckerd's and got my prescription and came back. And cleaned! The blinds are up, the window's open, the sun is shining...

It's a beautiful day.

'Stine and I are gonna do yoga later. Even though I'm soooo sore from shadow boxing last night. That's something I miss though about it- being sore in weird places like behind my knees and my upper back.

Crazy!

Thu, 22 Mar 2007 00:54:37 GMT

I'm an absolute idiot. Seriously. Dumber than a box of rocks. I should of just kept my mouth shut, on both accounts, but noooooo I had to go and say something, and manage to fuck up a perfectly good conversation, both last night and today.

See, this is why I don't like getting involved. I always fuck it up in the end.

And now I'm bashing my head repeatedly against a wall because he decided he'd rather do homework than talk to me.

The euphoria from shadow boxing has completely left me, and now I'm exhausted.

I'm just tired. In more ways than one.

Thu, 15 Mar 2007 02:33:44 GMT

It's been a long day. I'm working on work...and insane amount of it, actually, and trying to put my life together. Again.

It's frustrating.

On the bright side (cause there's always a bright side.) I made a playlist consisting of Reel Big Fish and other feel good songs.

Currently I'm listening to "Dixie Chicken."

<3

She took me to the river where she cast her spell and in that southern moonlight she sang a song so well. "If you'll be my dixie chicken, I'll be your Tennesee lamb...."

Sun, 25 Feb 2007 05:40:24 GMT

I wish I wasn't always a second choice or a last resort.
I wish people didn't always take advantage of my kindness.
I wish people didn't constantly steal my stuff.
I wish people didn't see me as a burden.

I wish people were nice to me, but some how I don't think that's ever going to happen.

I give up.

Fri, 16 Feb 2007 20:54:09 GMT

bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.bounce.

I'm excited.

I have a boy. And he is currently on his way here.

*giggles*

FINALLY! After the insane winter we've had.......

Tue, 13 Feb 2007 15:00:06 GMT

Sun, 11 Feb 2007 19:14:36 GMT

Masque ball last night was amazing. It was preceded by Justine's amazing hair skillz and slightly drunk renditions of Rent songs and "Defying Gravity" from Wicked. Soooo many people in my room... I didn't even know a couple of their names.... hahaha.

Then the masque itself!
   -Creepy guys. Why do they always attach themselves to me and Justine?
   -Randi is an amazing dancer. It was so cool to watch.
   -Bad music. So much bad music.
   -Possibly working an overnight? Shane is supposed to call me.
   -Fred looked so bored.
   -Matt and Matt.... Weaver was drop dead gorgeous and my Matt had problems with resistance. Weaver is still too much like Gabe for my    liking.
   -"OH MY GOD! YOU LOOK LIKE A GIRL!" I <3 Shiv.
   -Cotton Eyed Joe!
   -The Buttons Dance!

All in all an amazing night. :D

My roomie supposed to be back sometime today. I have no idea when, but I've taken advantage of her absence by cleaning and playing Zelda.

:D

Justine, Jackie, Dana, Ally, and Me!

Fri, 09 Feb 2007 00:13:45 GMT

Rant rant rant rant rant.

I hate morphemes. Or rather, I hate people who can't figure out morphemes. I have this one girl in ALL THREE OF MY SPEECH CLASSES who, despite detailed explanations in ALL THREE CLASSES, continues to ask questions about them.

Well, I've got news for you darling. They're easy. Second graders know how to deal with them. You are a senior in college. You should not be dumber than a box of rocks. Look, I'll explain it again. You take a word, and you find the base word, such as book or speak, and then you count that and the number of prefixes and suffixes you had to take off in order to get to that word.

Example:

Books = Book/s = 2 Morphemes.
Cheddar= Cheddar = 1 Morpheme.
Unspeakably = Un/speak/abl/y = 4 Morphemes.

Please either get the point or drop the fucking class. All three of them.

In other news, I had possibly the most awkward conversation in the HISTORY of awkward conversations with my father- I asked him if it was ok if I went on birth control.

Now, regardless of the answer to this question, I fully intend to. I just like to have parental approval on these things.

After asking me about my sex life (::cringes::. I had to admit about Gabe. Awkward. Feels like the first time....) his response was along the lines of, "It's fine by me, but ask your mother."

Ask my mom?

MY MOM????

Do I look like I have a death wish?

Honestly.

Sat, 03 Feb 2007 18:17:27 GMT

I'm still angry that stupid people ditched me last night and didn't bother to tell me they were going out, resulting in me inadvertently taking it out on Ryan because I didn't want to be alone, something I feel really really REALLY bad about... it's something that's gotten me in trouble before....and I REALLY don't want THAT to happen....

But yeah.

Whatever.

Pep band this morning, and then again tonight! Sweetness in a box! Hahaha. We're going to DESTROY Northeastern. Fuck yes, duuuuuude.

<3 I'm so glad Steve talked me into this. So glad.

AND THERE'S A K'NEX ROLLERCOASTER IN THE LOUNGE!

Could life be any better?

EDIT: Yes, it could be better. It could snow.

Me: i hate this weather
Me: its sunny
Me: and cold
Me: with winds that put the temps in the negative range
Me: BUT NO SNOW
Katherine: I like that weather, usually. But usually there's snow on the ground when it's like that. Blan.
Me: THAT ONE DAY IT WILL WARM UP TO ABOUT 50 DEGREES
Me: and give us RAIN
Me: the next day though!
Me: it'll be -7837498175
Katherine: Aw.
Me: ....
Me: >_>
Katherine: Is that lower than absolute zero?
Me: quite possibly.
Katherine: Because that's cold.